My Mommyology

Learning from Motherhood.

January 7, 2014
by mymommyology
0 comments

Lessons from Curves

So my two months at Curves had ended.  I tried (ahem! errr — really hard!) to stick to a regular 3x a week schedule, but unfortunately due to the  erratic holidays leading up to the last few weeks of my membership, I really wasn’t able to complete it.  And of course, there were the children.  I know, I know — excuses nonetheless.  But I am a mother, I suppose it’s really what I do.

It’s a shame though because Curves was a good program to begin with.  And I do know a few people who have actually lost weight and inches by going at least 3x a week!  So congratulations to them. 🙂

The key they say, is consistency.  They really had to prioritize and make time to go 30 minutes every other day (at least).  In fact, Curves had a 30 day 30-minute challenge for all their members.  The goal was to go to Curves 3x a week, and on the non-Curve days, you’d show you had to exercise for 30 minutes.  It could be anything from running, to chores, to playing with the kids.  That actually made sense to me, and is (should be) easy to do.  Thirty minutes without taking too much out of your daily routine…  It’s like jump-starting your body and getting the energy to flow.  A variation of activities will surprise your muscles, work different parts and burn calories.  The idea is to burn more than you consume anyway.

An inspirational poster on the Curves wall.

An inspirational poster on the Curves wall.

Speaking of which, consistency in diet and sleeping habits compliment a good workout program.  My problem was (is), that Jamie still wakes up for various reasons during the night.  And again, it’s only when the girls are asleep that I get to churn out productive output.  Hence, it is a struggle to maintain this supposed “balance”.  According to my brother, my body is overcompensating for the lack of sleep and so I tend to store rather than burn.  Hmmm… maybe in a few months (or years?!).

I did however, feel more energetic after my workouts.  Coming in tired from a lack of a good night’s rest, I would leave after 30 minutes feeling energized and ready to take on the day.  It was enough of a boost.

Checking your heart rate for ten seconds will tell you how much effort you're exerting.

Checking your heart rate for ten seconds will tell you how much effort you’re exerting.

In a simple way it showed the girls that I was doing something good for myself.  It was hard to leave them at first for many reasons (especially a very clingy Jamie who would wail and bawl when I’d walk out of the room), but I remembered what I wrote down when I first walked into the Curves studio.  One of my motivations to workout was to set a good example for my girls in doing something for themselves, and in taking care of themselves.  With the limited amount of time that I have, exercise is a form of me-time, and doing that (and gaining more energy in the process), actually meant having more energy for them later on.  All in all, it was a benefit to them in the end.   Eventually they seemed to understand and accepted this as part of our routine.

So maybe I couldn’t finish Curves the first time around, but it helped me make a good start towards a healthier lifestyle.  Hopefully that’s something I can continue throughout this next year.

Thank you Curves for accommodating the SoMoms!   If you haven’t yet, check them out at the 2nd floor of Serendra, facing Market! Market! or at their Eastwood branch. 🙂

 

January 6, 2014
by mymommyology
1 Comment

A Magical 5th Birthday

Despite my husband’s best efforts to downplay Sam’s 5th birthday last November, she still managed to wrangle her way into getting pretty much everything she wanted out of it.

Even when she was three she already knew the folks she wanted to invite and the theme and activities she wanted to do at her party.  She requested for a party each time too.  Her 5th birthday was no different.  And we’d been planning it since we completed her 4th birthday.

Since the cupcake making activity with Sonja last April, Sam knew she wanted to do that as well in her theme.  Sam (and Jamie) came with me to meet Erika of Cupcakes by Sonja to decide on the details, the design of the cupcakes and cookies, and the flavors.  For a while we’d been going back and forth between Hi-5 and How to Train Your Dragon, because she wanted them (and possibly Lalaloopsy too)… but finally when she talked to Erika (she did the talking, and not me.  I was apparently just the driver for the day), she had decided on a Hi-5 mixed with How To Train Your Dragon combined theme.  I really could not imagine how everything would look, but she and Erika worked it out anyway.

Thank you Erika and the Cupcakes by Sonja team for such a fun creative activity (and give-away) for each of the kids!

Thank you Erika and the Cupcakes by Sonja team for such a fun creative activity (and give-away) for each of the kids!

And then there was a huge cupcake as her cake.  I was originally going to get another supplier for the cake, but again Sam decided she wanted a huge rainbow cupcake with Ruffnut, her girl viking costume, on top of it.  So Erika conceded and the rainbow cupcake was actually all of pink, red and purple, as the celebrant had requested.

Cake vision c/o Sam, execution c/o Cupcakes by Sonja.

Cake vision c/o Sam, execution c/o Cupcakes by Sonja.

Sam also wanted face-painting — because it is her most favorite activity when she goes to any party.  I fear she will want a tattoo one of these days (as she and Jamie also write on themselves with washable ink!)… but hopefully the face painting and the glitter art and whatever colorful body paints are enough to satisfy this obsession.  We hired Clowning Around’s artist, and boy did everyone have fun… even the grown-ups! 😉

Children and lolos alike all lined up to get painted!

Children and lolos alike all lined up to get painted!

As her birthday drew near, Sam also wanted it to be a dance party.  And so we compiled a playlist of all her favorite children’s songs and the top 40 dance list that she listens to, and played that at the shindig.  It looks like the girls loved it too as they were ripping it up on the dance floor!

Girls gettin' down.  Or up rather.

Kids gettin’ down. Or up rather.

With Daddy as game-master/host/DJ, you would think her party was complete.  That, coupled with some on-going DVDs of Hi-5 to one side would be enough for Sam and her ever-growing guest list.  But no.

Sam attended a birthday party with a magic show, and was quite enthralled with the magicians illusions and tricks.  So much so that after his performance at the party, Sam walked straight up to the magician, introduced herself and asked him to please be at her 5th birthday party.  She also gave him the details.  My husband was completely tongue-tied with surprise and amusement that all he could do was accept the magician’s calling card.

At first we thought that it was something she would let go of as the days passed, but it was all the more fortified after we took her and Jamie to see Disney’s Magic Show (which was actually quite good!).  And so a Magic show there was.

One of my co-parents at Sam’s school was friends with Ricci the Magician.  He’s an illusionist and what I like about his jokes is that they’re wholesome.  Some of his tricks are a bit mature, but the kids and adults all seemed to enjoy him (save for the surprise snake he pulled out for his finally — my poor best friend flipped and wouldn’t come back in for an hour.  Sorry Polina!).  We had also requested that Sam be a part of his magic show and she so gamely participated and did magic.

Sam may want to be a magician when she grows up.

Sam may want to be a magician when she grows up.

For some reason lately she’s had this fascination with  Magic and Science, hence this birthday gift.  It was the first thing she opened.

Her very own Magic Box!

Her very own Magic Box!

You’d think with someone who’d already planned out her party in the afternoon, she’d have been satisfied.  Apparently not, as Sam also requested that we show up with donuts for recess to feed her classmates.  She was satisfied with a snowman donut though, so it wasn’t a big affair.  I don’t think I could have handled two big productions in one day, although Sam probably would have reveled in it.

Her snowman donut errr - cake?

Her snowman donut errr – cake?

All in all she said it was the best birthday…. yet.  And much to her daddy’s credit card’s dismay, she is already actively planning her 6th birthday.

I know that the planner part of Sam —  she got that from me.  But my husband and I, we like our birthdays quiet and low-key.  We’re not big on big birthday celebrations.  Apparently though Sam wouldn’t have it any other way.  And how can we say no when she takes so much joy in it?  Her birthday is really the one day in the year she is most excited about, even more than Christmas.  She is already such a smiley little girl, but her smile gets even bigger and doesn’t fade from the minute she wakes up, until she actually collapses to sleep.

We have 11 months to go.  Until then…!  😉

Adjustment Phase #3: Finding the Right Kind of “Help”

January 3, 2014 by mymommyology | 5 Comments

In light of my theme in doing things right this year, I fired our yaya.  (Much to the chagrin of my husband and my mother, if I dare do say so myself).

It’s crazy how nannies and household help permeate the conversations I have with a lot of my co-parents.  Crazy.  Everyone I know has had more than their fair share of help-issues.  We all agree:  good help is hard to find these days (and so for those of you who do have those prized gems, congratulations!).  And if I’m being completely honest, one of the biggest adjustments I’ve had to make is being an employer in my own home.  Ever since my husband and I got married and found our own place 8 years ago, we’d never had to hire help, and we did a lot of it on our own.

Admittedly, finding a nanny wasn’t the first on my list of things to do when we relocated back.  I wanted to take my time in finding “the perfect yaya” for our family.  I wasn’t totally sold on the concept of having a stranger take care of my home and my kids but I swallowed that down and accepted it nonetheless.  We were given a lot of advice: hire someone younger vs older, with less experience vs more (so they’re trainable), to the salary, compensation, benefits and pretty much everything else.  So many people have had so much experience how could I not listen and absorb.

Yet in the last 15 months with the several helpers we’ve hired and fired, there was still something nagging at the back of my head.  I couldn’t figure it out.  I kept telling myself (and I was being told), that I had to settle and compromise since there was no such thing as a “perfect yaya”.  And so I did let go a little, but it was beyond what I was comfortable doing.  Can you imagine the feeling; I wasn’t at home in my own home.  And it was only last month when somehow (I feel) I’d finally gotten a semblance of why.

Last December we had a #BetterMe session with Coach Pia, sponsored by Marca Piña Queso De Bola, Tonkita by Arix and Gustare Kitchen.  The topic was about Building Better Relationships with Helpers.  So apt for what I’d consider my biggest adjustment to Manila Life yet.

One of the things I appreciated from the session was the “Ability vs Willingness” discussion.  It’s a basic principle even in parenting and in marriage.  I don’t see why I didn’t think of it before to apply to the nanny situation.   In a way, hiring household help is also like adopting older children — because we end up caring for their needs and wants too.

The goal is to get helpers that were either Able (Capable) AND Willing, or Un-able (Incapable?) BUT Willing.  And if I was to chart our history of helpers thus far, it’s no wonder I was having problems.

Chart your help... it might actually help! ;)

Chart your help… it might actually help! 😉

Yayas #3 and 4 were siblings, very close in age.  And if I think about it now and look at this graph, while Yaya #3 was more capable of getting things done, yaya #4 may have been the better choice to keep.  It’s just that when we put the two of them together, both became less efficient.  And in retrospect, maybe the expectations of Yaya #4 were over what she was indeed capable of — which is why she couldn’t meet the bar.  I actually liked her work ethic, and so I happily referred her to other people.  I hear she has a good job with one of my relatives now, so I am happy for her.

As for yaya #3, I feel she was a waste.  She did good work, and the kids seemed to like her.  That’s why she lasted the longest with us, and occasionally showed promise in terms of tasks and attitude.  But there was always an excuse for something she did or didn’t do.  With her, I realized that I had negotiated some of my supposed nonnegotiables.  I had let go a lot of values which were important to me, telling myself that “maybe it’s me”.   Maybe I’m the problem.

That was another valuable lesson I learned during the session – and hence the theme for the year in doing things right.  Everything begins with the values of the people in the family.  Once those are set and clear, then the help that is hired has to buy into it, understand it and live by it.  Otherwise, it will cause a strain and not work out.

Coach Pia made us list down the values that would make up our ideal home.  I say “our” because it had to encompass the needs of all the family members.  It’s a good exercise if you haven’t done it yet.  The top three I identified for our family were:

1.  Efficient

2.  Promotes Growth and Development for the kids

3.  Safe, Secure and Stress-free

These values will translate into the tasks that need to be done, the areas around the house, the specific description (of how the value is carried out) and the people concerned.

A sample of Coach Pia's Values chart.  What does yours look like?

A sample of Coach Pia’s Values chart. What does yours look like?

The policies and house rules that are created are also grounded in the values.

And because of these, I know that we definitely need (at least) one household help.  It is important to my husband (and my mother since I borrow her trusted help every so often, because she’s the only one I’d trust my kids with), and if only for that reason, we must have one.  However since I have to deal with this person on a regular basis, I need to be comfortable with who I hire too.

In the working world, we’re told to hire slowly and fire quickly.  The same should apply to finding the “right” kind of help for us.  I understand very well that down the road there are some things I will need to compromise, and I am willing to do that.  For as long as my nonnegotiables remain as such, I think we’ll be ok.  And in the meantime while this process in ongoing, I will find ways and means that will make this transition period work out for us all.

Maybe I expect too much, but I do know what kind of home I want.  I know the kind of employer I am.  And because my family is my first priority, I believe I shouldn’t settle for anything less.

***

Thank you again to Tonkita by Arix for making such an informative session happen.  I’ve been using their cleaning tools, and they do make the job a lot easier.  Totally works with my “efficient” requirement! 😉 

Tonkita by Arix

Tonkita by Arix

Follow them on Facebook:  Arix Philippines and on Twitter:  @arixphilippines.

Our other sponsors: 

Marca Piña Queso de Bola, the best cheese there is coming straight from Holland, made especially for the Filipino palette!

 Gustare KitchenSuper duper yummy made-to-order food created by Ginny de Guzman.  You can find them at the W hotel on 39th street, behind Goose Station.  Call them:  +632 403 0345.

This gallery contains 6 photos

January 2, 2014
by mymommyology
1 Comment

My Mommyology in 2014: Do It Right

Happy New Year folks.

I apologize if I fell off the face of this earth for a while.  I think the holi-daze took quite the toll on me.  I have much to say, especially now that the new year has rolled in.

We spent the last few days of 2013 with family in the beautiful island of Boracay.  It was the first time I allowed the kids to stay up late and catch the fireworks that lit up the entire strip.  It wasn’t the easiest thing to do, but Sam enjoyed every bit of it, and Jamie — well Jamie eventually warmed up to it.  A shame though, it was raining heavily so we couldn’t appreciate it on the actual beachfront.  We had to hide the kids under the canopies to prevent them from getting soaked.  But no doubt it was a sight nonetheless.

Let's Start 2014 Right...Boom!

Let’s Start 2014 Right…Boom!

The new year is always a good time to reflect on what has come and what will be.  2013 is what I call a “work-in-progress” kind of year.  I am still very much a work-in-progress, not really quite adjusted to life in Manila.  Maybe it just takes time.  Maybe I won’t ever be?  All I know is that it’s A LOT of work, coupled with a roller coaster of emotions.  But I did learn some very valuable things about the people around me, the world around me and a whole lot more about myself.

And so to start off my new year, my goal is to do things right.   Or at the very least to try harder to get it right.  Sounds like the theme a former boss coined for his team in my past life:  Get it Right, Get it Great.  And it kind of does go with the root of the lesson that I learned from Coach Pia in one of our #BetterMe sessions, which is living out my APV.  Know what your values are and allow it to permeate through everything you do.  Everything else will follow.

May you have a happy new year.  And hopefully we can help each other out it starting 2014 right… and everyday thereafter.

December 4, 2013
by mymommyology
0 comments

Lunching with Lalaloopsy

It’s finally December, and oh my goodness… is Christmas in full swing or what.

I realize more and more that my Christmas list is composed of children 8 years and below.  Not only that, because I have kids of my own, the toy stores are a frequent pit stop.  Even if we don’t buy, they just have to look and play and ask (well, okay — they attempt).  And let’s face it, while toys aren’t actually a necessity and a lot of creative imaginative play can come from regular items at home, some of them are cute, fun and educational too.

Over the last year, the girls have taken to Lalaloopsy.  I blame OCMominManila:  she introduced Sam to her first Lalaloopsy Tree House one birthday ages ago.  Since then both of us have been addicts and fans of the brand and have gifted it to our girls (and to each other at one point I think!).  Kris knows all the new Lalaloopsy toys out there.  My girls and I have collected quite a few.  Amazingly enough, we haven’t had a duplicate just yet!

You can imagine our (our = kids AND parents) delight when Patty of Non-stop Babble arranged a lunch with the distributors of Lalaloopsy, Bankee Trading Inc.   Jenny Fernandez, the Ad & Promo Manager of Bankee Trading welcomed us all there and told us about the world of Bankee toys.  Established in 1986, Bankee carries over 60 different brands of baby and children’s toys and products that are distributed all over the Philippines.  Some of them are our personal favorites (and we buy these toys and things for the kids that we give to!):  Lalaloopsy, Summer Infant, Leap Frog, Little Tikes, Winnie the Pooh, the Sylvanian Families, Hello Kitty, PinyPon and Graco to name a few.  Some other crafty things for girls like Blingles and Gelarti were also part of their list.

There are also the boys’ toys like Ben Ten, Ban Dai, Micro Chargers, Hex Bugs and most recently, the Power Rangers.  A main avenue for these toys would be in ToyTown, with three branches located around the Metro.

The boys' toys.  Purty cool!

The boys’ toys. Purty cool!

The more I learned about Lalaloopsy and the rationale behind the brand, the more I liked it.  It didn’t matter that the dolls don’t really stand on their own; it’s all part of the imaginative pretend play!  And you can do so much with them.  I’m so glad that they released different clothes that are sold separately from the dolls because that’s one thing my girls love to do:  dress each one up and mix and match their things!

Now this is smart. ;)

Now this is smart. 😉

During the lunch, we got a sneak peek at some of the new things that were going to hit the stores.  You can imagine how thrilled my girls were with everything in front of them!  It was hard to tear them away and they kept asking if we could buy and bring it home.

"We want it all mom!"

“We want it all mom!”

Luckily, Jamie won one of them Color Splasherz and that appeased them (temporarily).  The prize was so cute, we gave it out as a gift as well!

Our winning children and their happy loot! :)

Our winning children and their happy loot! 🙂

But the best surprise of all was when Peanut Big Top walked into the room.  She came and gave everyone a big hug!  She even took pictures with the kids.  My girls were starstruck!  They wanted to take her home too!

It's Peanut Big Top!  Oh happy day!

It’s Peanut Big Top! Oh happy day!

Bankee carries all sorts of brands, for kids of all ages, and there’s always something great about each brand.  It’s the easiest way to complete my Christmas list!

Thank you Jenny and Bankee Trading!  For more information, visit their website http://www.bankee.com.ph

%d bloggers like this:
Skip to toolbar