My Mommyology

April 30, 2014
by mymommyology
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Our Disney Dream Favorites (Part 2)

And so goes the continuation of the Disney Dream favorites! You may like these ones because they are highlights from our ports of call in the Bahamas.

The Dolphin Encounter at Atlantis, Bahamas. When my husband and my brother-in-law were planning the trip, they asked the kids if they’d like to have a dolphin encounter. Who wouldn’t want to meet a dolphin up close? Even Jamie was excited and she talked about it for weeks on end. And so for our first port of call at Nassau Bahamas, we visited the lost city of Atlantis.

The entire Dolphin encounter took most of the day. We got our tags at 1030AM; disembarked and got to Atlantis at 1130AM, and made our way on foot to Dolphin Cay. We got briefed close to 1215pm and finally had the 90-minute encounter. By the time we washed, dressed and finished it was 2pm and the kids were cranky for their lunch. In any case, I digress.

The wonderful thing about the Dolphin encounter is that the keepers there truly love and care for all the dolphins. You can see and feel it in the way they handle the groups and the dolphins themselves. They all say they love their job (and it doesn’t sound like they’re just saying it too, you know what I mean?) The briefing is important so you know what parts of the Dolphin NOT to touch, and what you can do with them. Here we also understood that they had to adjust the water temperature and make it cooler so that it is more comfortable for the Dolphins to live in.

At the beginning of the encounter, they encourage everyone to stay in the shallows and stay still if possible. I think the kids were just too excited that they kept moving about, and so it took a while for a dolphin to want to come to us and be comfortable with us.

See the guide up front? He’s telling everyone to hush.

Finally the baby of the bunch, 2-yr old Sans, decided to stick around.

The keepers then showed us how to hug and kiss them and one by one everyone was given a turn to be near baby Sans. At first the adults accompanied the kids to pet and hug and kiss. Once everyone was done, Sam asked them if she could do it herself. They said yes of course and with my heart in my throat, I watched her approach and do the whole thing all by herself.

She’s really an adventure-seeker, I must say.

I was worried not-so-light Sans would snap the nose off my little girl, but the guides said dolphins are gentle. And they like to be kissed! She even got to feed him this time around.

Catch!

Jamie was excited too and she did kiss the baby dolphin smack on the lips.

Kissy kissy!

But then when it was time to “hug” him and I bent down into the water the cold sensation and his gurgling noises frightened her. She wouldn’t even let me go near him on my own. The funny part about it was that when she started to cry, he started to cry with her as well.

You can’t hear him, but he’s crying too!

Strangely enough, he didn’t seem scared of her. They say that if the child is scared, you shouldn’t force them to approach because the dolphins can sense the fear and they too will shy away. I suppose because Jamie got a kiss in Sans decided she was okay.

It was an incredible and unforgettable experience. I’d never gotten that close to a dolphin before. They feel very soft and squishy. And they’re surprisingly heavy too! You feel the weight when you “hug” them as you wrap one arm gently around their bottom and slightly press against them as if you wanted to carry them.

Of course, these dolphins are trained to pose for the pictures (and smile even!) but you can still feel the weight of them on you. Even little baby Sans was quite heavy – we never expected it!

At the end of it all the dolphins come together and perform several tricks for everyone. The keepers encourage you to clap and cheer for them because dolphins are like kids they say, they love positive reinforcement.

Everything is provided for, before and after the encounter: water (with fresh pineapple bits!), towels and wetsuits. Basically you just have to worry about food and a change of clothes for after. (Incidentally, you can also swim through some slide tunnel surrounded by sharks, but our kids were all too young for it — something to consider for families with older kids!).

We killed some time walking around Atlantis and looking at the sunken parts as well as the sharks and other sea life that were there, but the kids were tired and it was soon time to head back to the boat anyway.

Castaway Cay. Quite honestly, I had no idea that Castaway Cay was a privately owned Disney island until I got there. What gorgeous sand (it feels like our very own Boracay!). The island is partitioned in such a way that there’s (again) something for everyone.

The map around the island.

And there are areas designated for you to eat, with buffet set-ups in two areas. It’s like a replica of the ship’s buffet set-up… but on the island!

The kids were supposed to do a stingray encounter (Jamie wasn’t allowed as she was under 5-yrs old), but in the end the crew decided to cancel it due to the weather. Instead the kids chose to play on the beach, but Jamie and I hung around the cabana with the dance party, and so she got to dance with two of the Disney characters — Minnie and Goofy (I’m told that the characters change every time, but you always get two to dance with the kids).

Jamie (and Sam) totally rocked this dance party too!

Afterwards we moved to the family area of the island where the kids found a giant slide that leads into the ocean.

The giant slide in the middle of the sea.

All the kids need life vests to cross and go on it (because the water is more than 6-feet deep), but they loved it. Sam went back on it at least 6 times. Jamie on the other hand, discovered a little sprinklers park and had her fun there.

There are other parts of the island where you can bike, play beach volleyball, shop or simply just lazy around.

And of course, there was also free ice cream!

nom-nom-nom

It is definitely worth disembarking and spending the day out on Castaway Cay. In fact the cruise moves a majority of its activities on the island (also because the crew on the boat are the crew that run the island as well), to encourage you to get off and pay it a visit. It makes you want to buy an island too actually! 😉

So there we have it! The last items on our Disney Dream favorites list. If I said anymore then the rest of the cruise wouldn’t be a surprise (should you choose to go on one in the near future!).

Essentially like every cruise, it’s what you make of it. Everything is set up for you to enjoy, you just need to pick and choose and go. And really when it’s a Disney Cruise, I doubt very much that you wouldn’t enjoy it!

April 28, 2014
by mymommyology
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Our Disney Dream Favorites (Part 1)

As a follow-up to last week’s post on the Disney Dream, here are some of our favorite parts from the cruise (based on inputs from our entire family). Watch out, a ton of pictures are coming your way… 🙂 Again I hope this is useful information to you for future vacation plans and considerations!

A room with a view and the double-decker beds. We were told that if you’re easily seasick and slightly claustrophobic, it’s better to get a room with a veranda. I think it costs a tad bit more than the lower rooms, but it’s also not as expensive as the suites. Jamie saw Dolphins as the ship was leaving the port too.

Taken from the door towards the veranda.

The rooms are small but they’re quite cozy and clean. And it’s always good to go back to a room you like.

And a veranda is always good for practicing model poses.

When we first entered I thought that our whole family would share a bed, but as we came back after dinner, we discovered that they had provided for two extra beds (with guard-rails upon our request) for the girls to sleep on. And they really did sleep in their own beds! It was such a treat to have space and not get kicked in the face for a few nights! 🙂

I will use this as a pre-cursor to getting them to sleep in their own beds SOON.

In the adjoining room, the girls discovered that their cousins had bunk beds. Of course for one night, Sam asked our cabin attendant if she could have a bunk bed too! Of course, she slept on it only for a while because I was losing sleep with her being so high up.

The double-deck request.

Hair-braiding. This was Sam’s top agenda when we got onto the ship and moved around. She wanted her hair braided. She didn’t want it all braided, just a few strands. Of course Jamie did too, and they insisted on keeping it all on for the entire cruise. You can imagine how frizzy their hair was when I finally took it off!

Here they are in their hair braiding glory. Mind you, it’s $2 a braid.

Free Ice Cream. Actually, there was free food almost 24/7. Certain restaurants had buffet breakfast open from 6AM – 11AM, and buffet lunch open from 10AM – 5PM (which is just about the time that the first batch of dinner runs started). At the top deck, there were ice cream swirl machines that you could just get from. They would change the flavors too every so often, so you didn’t know what you were gonna get that day (apart from Vanilla and Chocolate).

She was indeed an ice cream monster!

Literally the kids could have them even at 3 in the morning because they were just THERE. Jamie my little ice cream monster made good use of them for the entire trip.

The Nightly Shows at the Walt Disney Theatre. At 545PM every afternoon, our little family would make our way to the Walt Disney Theatre to line up for the 615PM show. It was good to be early and get good seats (fourth or fifth row center were typically good) because the shows were all worthwhile (pictures aren’t allowed inside while the show is ongoing). You’re not allowed to reserve seats too, so it’s important to have everyone there to sit in their seat.And as the days passed, more people knew they had to be there early too.

My little muse outside the Theatre.

The production value of these shows is amazing. And it’s the same ensemble for all four days — you can imagine how many dance steps songs and character roles they had to memorize!

If you catch the show on the first day, you can buy one of those buckets of popcorn and take them again with you the next day to refill at a cheaper price. It also gives the kids something to do while waiting for the show to start.

Sam and Jamie had been watching Hercules before we left, and on the second night of the show, Pain and Panic were roaming the aisles. Of course my little Peacock did not hesitate to get a picture with them both.

This is Sam with Panic. Or is this Pain?!

Animator’s Palate. Every night set dinner at a specific restaurant is assigned to your family. For our last dinner we ate at Animator’s Palate, which was actually at the back of the ship. And at the onset the wall decor is pretty cool because it showcases the drawings of the animations of different characters. Once everyone is seated though and the dinner service starts, suddenly the “walls” become interactive screens.

It’s amazing to watch the drawings turn into screens. You’d never guess.

I suppose since we were on a boat, the theme was an underwater submarine and Crush and the rest of the Finding Nemo characters would appear. Crush would talk to the kids as well and ask them their name and where they’re from and things like that. The kids were thoroughly entertained because Dory asked them to play guessing games too.

Here’s Bruce scoping out the folks.

Of course the food was excellent. But the place totally blew me away. I’m told there’s a restaurant like this in one of the Orlando parks too.

The Oceaneer Kids’ Club (or Lab). Half the 3rd deck is dedicated to a kids only zone called the Oceaneer Lab. We weren’t allowed to take pictures inside but the place is really every child’s haven.

Outside the Oceaneer Lab

If you wanted to, you could leave them there the minute they woke up and pick them up right before they go to bed (of course we didn’t do that, but technically you can). And there are enough people watching over the kids there that no one gets lost or bored or hurt and every kid has an awesome time. Ask any child, they want to go back over and over again. Jamie my clingy little Dove generally wouldn’t want to leave my side, but when we dropped her off at the Kid’s club, she willingly said goodbye and didn’t look for me. In fact when we picked them up, she didn’t want to leave. There was a Toy Story bootcamp inside one of the club’s rooms and the girls met one of the green toy soldiers who gave them “parachute” backpacks and taught them how to march and salute and do all kids of solider things.

Hungry soldiers after bootcamp.

Upon registration for the kids when you board the ship, they tag each child with an arm band that’s sort of like a GPS tracker.

It is waterproof, sandproof and childproof!

Essentially it can tell you where your child is on any part of the ship and any point in time. And at the Oceaneer’s club, when you check them in, they scan the band so that they can track which room your child is as well and tell you exactly when you pick them up. Pretty cool!

There is a continuation to this post, coming soon…. 😉

April 25, 2014
by mymommyology
6 Comments

The Disney Dream Cruise

Many have been asking me about our Disney Cruise adventure, so here it is! 🙂 I hope it’s helpful!

The first part of our summer vacation was spent aboard the Disney Disney Dream Cruise with the kids and my brother-in-law’s family (thank you again to my parents-in-law for such a generous summer gift!). It was a 5-day, 4-night itinerary, through the Bahamas. My husband and I had been on a 6-night Alaskan cruise before, and we thought the length of time might be too overwhelming for the kids (although the longer out you are at sea, the easier it gets on the seasickness). We’ve also always wanted to go to the Bahamas at one point in our lives, hence the consideration of this particular cruise. Disney also has its own island in the Bahamas called Castaway Cay (who buys an island I tell ya?!), which they say is worth a visit.

They were happy to be with Captain Mickey!

Based solely on this experience, I’d say a Disney Cruise is a good idea for a family vacation. It is enjoyable for everyone regardless of age. There’s always something for everyone to do at any point in time. It’s like they think of everything, it’s amazing how well-oiled the ship is run day in and day out. And they keep it current — Frozen and Captain America’s Winter Soldier were showing in the Buena Vista Theater for instance.

The Disney Dream is a relatively new ship too so everything looks and feels totally brand new and clean. The whole experience is totally exhausting though. We’re constantly moving from one point of the ship to the next, sometimes taking the stairs several flights up and down (it was faster), and getting in line for all sorts of things all the time. That said, I would still totally recommend it for any family, and I would love to do it again (which means I need to find a way to make money grow on trees).

To help make the most of your Disney Cruise:

For transcontinental travelers, arrive a day or so before you board the ship. Our cruise was set to sail out of Cape Canaveral on April 6, but my husband and I decided to book a flight into Florida on the 4th. It gave the girls a change to decompress and acclimatize, and get rid of some of the travel fatigue. We stayed with best friends in Tampa with no agenda but to sleep and eat. That helped relax us before traveling on the 6th to board the ship. The ship’s sail time on the 6th was at 5PM, but my husband booked us for a 1PM check-in, to give ample time for us to get on board, eat and explore before we set sail.

Pre-register and fill out the online forms. Weeks before you take the cruise, they send you a booklet containing forms and information you’d need to know. Read it and fill everything out before getting to the check-in area. It will make the process go smoother and faster, and faster is always good with kids in tow.

The long check-in lines.

Also, you’d want to read through the activities in each port of call and already register yourselves for them. It saves a lot of time rather than standing in line on the ship getting the next available slot (that’s a separate line from check-in, by the way). I don’t suggest you fill up your whole day with pre-planned activities. Maybe just 1 or 2 per day at most, because again there are a lot of discoveries you’ll make when you finally get on board.

Here’s a tip: Bring food and water for the kids. With long lines kids get hungry while waiting. Best to keep them fed and happy. There are TVs playing cartoons in the waiting area so they can happily watch while you stand in line.

Verify other requirements. It was quite last-minute, but we learned that we needed a separate Visa into the Bahamas. Now this is debatable as well since some travel agencies say they don’t require it, but we chose to play it safe. We’ve heard stories of you not being able to board the ship at all if your visa requirements aren’t complete (even if you travel with a US Visa already). The nearest embassy to the Commonwealth of the Bahamas is in China, and so it takes at least 3 weeks to get the papers all sorted out and back to Manila.

Also if you’re traveling with little kids, there are some additional requirements that might be needed, like a list of their medication or allergies and things like that. They ask you upon pre-boarding and if it’s not declared then you’d need to fill out another form, which will take time.

Allot time for lines. Everyday on the cruise, you’ll receive what they call the Navigator. It has every activity that’s happening, where and what time. It’s best to read through it well each night and plan your day around it. For the shows, allot at least 20 minutes before each showing to line up. The character pictorials as well will require time, and usually after about 15-20 minutes there’s someone standing at the end of the line to tell you that they have to close it because “Minnie has to fit her outfit for tonight’s ball” or something like that. So you may miss them — although not to worry, because everyday on the ship they’ll be around for one picture or another. Everything runs on time as scheduled, like a well-oiled machine.

Prepare to dress up. I wasn’t planning to pack girls’ princess dresses; then I remembered Peggy Orenstein’s comment about how kids always dress up when they’re in Disney. I got Elsa and Anna sister aprons for the girls at Celestina & Co., and a Sofia the First Princess outfit for Jamie. And it’s a good thing too, because when it was time to meet the princesses, EVERY little girl was in a princess dress!

One of the many princess shots in their Princess dresses (aprons!)!

Our cruise also had a pirate night, so I packed Jamie’s pirate outfit.

Pirate garb for everyone…

Sam didn’t have one, but thankfully our friends in Tampa had given her an Izzy costume when we arrived. And in the afternoon, you find on your bed, a little something to wear for the evening, for every member of the family.

… yes everyone. (Sam chose her Izzy costume over the headwear).

A lot of the adults gamely dressed up as well during the cruise, which actually gave our boat a little bit more flavor. 😉

Unplug and enjoy. Wifi wasn’t free, and it was costly. They charge on a per MB basis. I decided I didn’t need to be connected for 5 days (and anyway we were always busy and completely exhausted at the end of the day!), and it was quite liberating not to worry about emails and what I was missing on Facebook for a few days.

Expect to see everything Mickey. Of course, it is Disney. There’s “a hidden Mickey” everywhere.

Spot the hidden Mickey!

I hope that’s helped some of the folks asking about our Disney Experience. Watch out for next week when I post our favorite parts of our Disney Cruise experience!

If you have any more questions about our trip, please feel free to post them here and I’ll get to them as soon as I can!

April 21, 2014
by mymommyology
2 Comments

Summer Vacation (Preparation)

Happy Easter Monday!

I’ve been AWOL from the blog these last few weeks. If you’re following me on any of my other social media accounts, you’ll notice I’ve been traveling with the family. It was our much awaited summer vacation. From sand to snow at all degrees of weather (literally), so says my husband. It’s been a crazy and exhausting, but definitely all worthwhile. The entire 3-week experience is too much to compress in one blog post, so I will split them up accordingly in succeeding entries. There is much to tell.

Looking back at it all now, I feel I’ve gained some new insights in traveling with toddlers that are worth sharing. It’s all good too as I feel I was able to adjust better in preparation for the trip.

Dive into the details. For starters, I will say that it helped a lot that my husband and brother-in-law are great travel planners. We traveled with my brother-in-law’s family for most of the trip, and even months before the boys would sit down over Mary Grace ensaymadas to research and plan the different aspects of our “adventure”. They spent a lot of hours and sleepless nights working through the little details of what we would do and when (and of course, how much it would all cost).

Brothers planning over the kids’ Lucky Charms.

They’ve always been like that, even when we’d take trips when it was just the four of us (my husband, brother-in-law, my sister-in-law and myself). Now with our families it’s a much bigger production number, taking into account everyone’s wants, needs, concerns and limitations. Somehow though they make it work.

It really helped that they read through all the fine print beforehand. My brother-in-law discovered that to go on our 4-Day Bahamian Disney Cruise, we needed a separate Visa into the Bahamas. It’s a good thing too, or else we may not have been able to board the ship in the first place! (Side note: There is still a debate about this point amongst travel agencies, but we chose to play it safe and get one anyway). Apparently getting a Visa into the Bahamas (from the Philippines) requires you to send all original documents to China, which is host to their nearest embassy. My sister-in-law had to open a Fedex account so as to ensure that the mail back of all our paperwork would have an appropriate charge account, and could get back to us in time.

Pack your bags early. Contrary to my usual travel cramming habits, I had the suitcases out a week before the actual trip. I slowly filled each one according to what we’d use in each stop, and what gifts we needed to bring and carry. It helped manage the weight distribution too. And with the boys’ early planning and day-by-day itinerary, we knew exactly when we would do laundry; so I knew how much to pack. Of course with Sam my little Peacock, I still packed several extra outfits. My husband kept questioning me about it, but I stuck to my gut. And true enough, every other piece of clothing Sam owned got soiled at one point.

A little hard to pack with these two using the suitcases as pirate ships.

Expect a disruption in their routine. The different time zones, activities and in between travel (we jumped from East to West Coast), was “not kid-friendly”, as my husband says. The kids’ schedules were topsy-turvy from the very beginning. The routine I am so used to and fond of was totally thrown out the window. And even when I’d try to get them back on track somehow, the next day there would be something new, or we were traveling again. The girls would eat way past lunch time and sleep way past dinner time, for most of the trip. Sometimes we were jumping flights, there was really no time to eat anything but the crackers that I had in my bag. They would nap at odd hours, or not at all. Once, Jamie was so tired and battling jet lag she slept from 4PM one afternoon until 4AM the next morning.

She just collapsed.

I am such a routine person and I value their sleep and rest that this bit was hard for me. I had to constantly tell myself to just let it go (cue Idina Menzel) and go with the flow. Naturally, with their systems out of whack and their routines lost at sea, their emotions were constantly on a roller coaster ride.

Nonetheless, having this in mind, it helps to expect it, and to plan against it. I’d have a bunch of crackers and packs of cereal in my bag for eating emergencies. At the very least they’d have something in their stomach. I packed pajamas and toothbrushes and washed them down at some airports so that in case they fell asleep on the car ride home, I wouldn’t need to wake them to get them cleaned out and changed. I let them nap at the oddest hours for however long. A lot of the time, we would get them to bed past 10PM. I think I surprised even myself with how flexible I was with the lack of our routines. Taking these entire three weeks as an anomaly to our typical days, helped, and I figure I’ll just work on getting us back on track once we get back to Manila.

Have confidence in your parenting. I have Coach Pia to thank for this one; and I think the rest flowed and followed because of it.

The day before our flight out I saw Coach Pia and had a few moments alone with her before our meeting (my very own private #BetterMe!). I started telling her about our trip and about my apprehensions. Essentially I laid down all my fears. Coach Pia just smiled at me and said, “You forget they’re YOUR kids, and you’re one of the most resilient people I know.”

She was telling me to find the confidence in the way I parent the girls. I can handle any kind of situation and they would respond to me, because of the relationship I’ve already established with them. And of course, as it is in my genes to be resilient, it’s no doubt that they too inherited this trait. “They take their cue from you,” she said (talk about leading by example!). Besides, children by nature are resilient, and so I should believe they’d hold up in any situation we faced, for as long as I set the tone and pace.

I think that was the most helpful insight of all, because finding that inner confidence did get me (us) through a lot of situations I normally would have stressed about. But if you ask me how one would know when to trust in your current parenting skills, I wouldn’t be able to give an answer.

I don’t think there’s a definite criteria for it; but just by knowing your kids and yourself, then you’d just know.

So there we have it folks. The prelude to our summer vacation. And if you are about to go on yours (or are already on it), I hope that you find bits and pieces of this helpful in your travels as well. What are your family travel insights and tips?

April 3, 2014
by mymommyology
3 Comments

The Fine Line Between Disciplining and Bullying Our Children

I never liked bullies. Who does, really? I had a few of them in my life growing up and they were no fun. They made the growing up years so much harder than it should’ve been (although as we say now we live and learn and build character through these experiences, but anyway. It’s besides the point).

Now that I’m a parent, I worry about my kids getting bullied too. Sam experienced it as a baby, and while I know that the ~~devil~~ child was not in full consciousness of what she was doing, I still felt my blood boil. I am that parent who’d defend their child at any cost.

How ironic was it for me to realize (fairly recently) that the act of bullying can actually start in the home. With parents like ourselves.

The fact is, it’s very hard to discipline children. You have to be consistent. You have to be firm. You have to be fair (amongst other things). And from what I’ve experienced, it’s always a hit and miss. Sometimes they’ll listen and they’ll get it; and often times they won’t, or they won’t want to. I know first hand how that can drive any parent crazy. The testing, the pushing of limits… it can get under your skin. As the parent, I feel responsible for the behavior of my kids. Disciplining them weighs heavy on my shoulders. There’s no giving up, no backing out. We HAVE to produce results. And more than that, I want peace, harmony and just some semblance of order. It’s an indication that I’m doing something right, after all.

But to get there can be a problem. And honestly when disciplining, it’s so much easier to raise our voices, call out mistakes, or threaten kids to listen and obey.

The body language says it all.

“Eat your vegetables or else you can’t go to the park,” says the parent in an attempt to get their child to eat something healthy.

“Stop running or else you can’t go swimming,” says the mother who has put her little boy in his swimsuit and is waiting by the pool for the teacher to arrive.

“Share your toys or else I won’t let you play with them anymore.”

When you read them again though, don’t they sound like a big bad bully to you?

At the onset, we really don’t see this as bullying our children. It’s just a typical parent who’s trying to get their children to do the right thing. We are after all, just disciplining them the way we know how. These are things parents say with good intentions. Vegetables are good for the body. Running by the slippery pool area is in fact dangerous. Sharing is caring (and a valuable life skill to learn). In fact, there’s really nothing wrong with the intention and the motivation. It’s just in the execution of it when things get tricky.

Coach Pia has made me realize that the way we say it really matters. The words we use, the tone we use, and the manner in which we carry it out… it all makes a difference. Refraining from using “no” a lot or setting them as limitations (that need to be tested and pushed). A calm voice. Reasoning and explaining instead of dictating. Removing “I told you so,” from our list of statements. Making good on deals made instead of empty threats. It’s a world of difference.

The statements:

“Vegetables are good for you, and I want you to be strong and healthy for when we play in the park, so let’s eat a little bit before we go”;

“I know you’re excited to swim, and you may not mean to but I worry you might slip and hurt yourself. So please sit down and let’s think of something else to do while waiting for teacher”; and

“It would mean a lot to me if you shared your toys with your sister. We can think of a game you could do together.”

Are worlds apart from their original counterparts. The intention is the same; but the effect on the child could be totally different. After all, who likes being dictated to and screamed at? And isn’t it a typical parental complaint that after constantly berating them with loud harsh words, they learn to tune you out? It doesn’t set a good example as to how they should relate to others. In fact, it also teaches them to be bullies.

Again, the body language. Worlds apart ey?

The HOW we say it also matters. Eye contact, down at their level versus shouting it over their heads, for instance. Holding them close and talking instead of shouting. Finding the right teaching moment which is non-threatening is very helpful too.

There’s no reason why we shouldn’t discipline our kids in a loving way. You can still be firm, consistent and fair, without the coercion into submission (read: without the bullying). It helps to remember that the rule is bigger than us. We don’t just want the kids to listen to us because we’re their parents. We want them to understand the WHY behind it all.

I cannot begin to tell you how many disciplining mistakes I’ve made to date. When I realized this, it hurt me to think that I was in fact a bully to my kids, and that is a regret I will have forever. If only for that, I promise to change and try harder. There’s no way I can say I’ve got it all down pat, but at the very least I hope the girls see I’m trying my darn-dest best. When I slip (and I do slip, believe me), I apologize and process the incident with them after. At the very least, I’m aware that I don’t want to do it anymore, and that’s the first step in making the change.

Admittedly it isn’t the method that will get the fastest, most immediate results. And admittedly… it’s HARD! Being consistently patient, catching yourself before you explode; no one wants to be a broken record on repeat (as if that weren’t redundant enough). But it is all part and parcel of the parenting process. And anyway, it is the method that sticks with them better in the long run.

We become better parents because we want to give our kids the best, and hopefully influence them to be better people someday too. And when I think of it this way, I persevere and continue to try, if only because I love my kids to the moon and back.

My Mommyology

Learning from Motherhood.

Our Disney Dream Favorites (Part 2)

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Our Disney Dream Favorites (Part 1)

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The Disney Dream Cruise

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Summer Vacation (Preparation)

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The Fine Line Between Disciplining and Bullying Our Children

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