Before I left Manila, I invested in a little me-time for myself and attended The One Core’s Discover Your Core Weekend (DYC).
It was Coach Pia’s recommendation that I do this. She was confident it would help me with this big transition we’ve made. And I have to say, it was a good idea. No — it was a great idea.
The Discover Your Core Weekend runs every 3rd weekend of the month at the Eugenio Lopez Center in Antipolo. The package includes food and overnight accommodations, although I chose not to stay overnight. My husband had already left for LA and I was alone with the girls. I couldn’t bring myself to also leave them overnight (even if it was just for one night), when they’ve never slept a night of their lives without me before. Thankfully The One Core was (is) very flexible and they accommodated me as a live-out guest for the weekend. Admittedly from where I lived, it was a trek, but I understood it to be my choice and I was okay with that. Again, it was totally worth it.
First I will say that it’s not one of those overly emotional retreats that leave you on a high (only to come crashing down into reality a few weeks later). I found everything about DYC to be down-to-earth and very realistic.
Coach Pia equips you with tools and a framework when making decisions big or small. It’s all promptly applied through her examples and through the sharing of the participants. In my weekend we were only 5 (there’s a max of 10 people per weekend), so we were able to share in-depth. And I liked everyone’s openness – which is essentially the first step: to be open to the process.
That’s one thing Coach Pia emphasizes: we each have our own process. We must respect that we go at our own pace. It may take some longer than others to reach a decision that they’re finally comfortable with, but in the end… it’s their process! And the only way is through.
Coach Pia still started and ended the 1.5 days around her five circles.
You’ve seen this many times in some of my past posts and she keeps going back to that. The ultimate goal is to make sure that each one is inflated equally. In DYC, the framework helps you prioritize and focus on inflating one bubble at a time.
My biggest take away from DYC was about staying true to your authentic self. How do you know that’s it? Decisions should be made freely, and not out of pride and/or fear.
Coach Pia’s tip: Look for a time in your life when you had zero self-doubt. It’s a memory and a time before the onset of adulthood. Find yourself in that mind frame before taking on a big decision.
It’s not easy! In hindsight, I realize some of the “not-so-good” decisions I’ve made were done out of pride or fear. The yaya situation for instance — no wonder I couldn’t find good help! But when the decision is made freely, then everything else will flow.
It doesn’t mean though that they’re always going to be decisions you’re comfortable with. Sometimes they’re also not the most accepted or the most popular decisions. And this is seen best when you’re married and when you have kids. As a mom, you do things that are better for them and for the family over those that you want for yourself. I can’t tell you how many of these I feel I’ve made in the last few years (days!). Disciplining them is one example. Is there any parent who enjoys being the bad cop? We do it though because we know it’s best for them, even if it’s tough on us.
I will say that after the DYC, there’s less heaviness and doubt hanging over my head after I make decisions. I’m clearer about why I make them, and I’m more confident too. And therefore I feel lighter — and don’t need to apologize for them (Coach Pia did say I apologize too much for who I am and what I do or don’t do — which shouldn’t be the case). I still need to practice though to make the framework second nature, but isn’t that what life is all about — a constant work-in-progress?
Recently the girls have been addicted to Rise of the Guardians. And because of the movie, Sam keeps asking us what our “center” is. It’s a good reminder too – to constantly ground myself in what makes me authentic and true. After all, being a better self is always the best place to start. 🙂
Coach Pia is currently helping out couples in the latest Reality TV Series called #IDo. Catch her and the rest of the I Do cast and crew onSaturdays after MMK – 9:30 pm, and on Sundays after Rated K – 8:45 pm.