My Mommyology

Learning from Motherhood.

July 7, 2011
by mymommyology
6 Comments

Lessons Learned

Ever since I can remember I’ve always included “putting things back” as a lesson Sam needed to learn.  I read somewhere that it takes time for toddlers to process these things which is why you do end up sounding like a broken record.  Even after you’ve seen progress in comprehension, you’d still have to repeat it because chances are, when they get excited or distracted about something else, cleaning up is the first thing out the window.

In an effort to make it stick to her smart little brain, I have Sam parrot it back to me.  “After you use it, you put it back mom!”  She’d reply proudly, picking up things all by herself.

Of course, the habit of packing away isn’t consistent yet and I still find myself constantly reminding her to do it, even if she already knows she has to.  I even tried to teach her initiative.  “Remember you need to put it away, and do it before Mommy says so!”  Either it’s fallen on deaf ears, or maybe she’s too young.  But still, I long for the day that she’d do it without any reminder.

Then, one day…

Sam contracted her nth cold.  In Filipino, we call this sipon (pronounced sih-pohn, but Sam pronounces it as cee-pawn).  In any case, I’ve learned never to leave tissue within her reach because she uses half the box in one go.  Instead I leave out small washcloths or what we call pamunas (pronounced pah-mooh-nahs) for her to use.  I normally leave one on a table or on her bed, somewhere within reach.

Anyway, I was nursing Jamie in the living room one morning when I heard an explosive sneeze in the bedroom.  It was followed by a high-pitched cry, “Oh no!  Mommy!”  Sam ran out, her nose in the air, her sipon about to fall.

“Sam!  Get your pamunas, and wipe it please.  Mommy’s feeding Jamie, you have to do it by yourself.”

She ran back into the bedroom, and as I was immobilized I had hoped she found the pamunas.  Strangely enough she took longer than I had anticipated and I was worried I’d have to clean up gook on the floor or on the blanket or something of that sort.

Then I hear some scuffling that is followed by a few determined grunts, and then if I wasn’t mistaken, I thought I heard a drawer close shut.  “Sam?  What are you doing?”

She appears a few minutes later from the doorway and runs straight for me, “I’m so proud of you Mom!” (This normally means she wants me to say it).

Of course before I release such a statement, I need to find out what it is I am proud of.  “Why sweetheart, what did you do?”

I wipe it mom!  I wipe my sipon!  I did it!”  She says with a clap and a jump.  What an accomplishment!

Very good Sam.  Where’s the pamunas?”

“I put it back mom!”

I smile relieved.  No sipon on the floor?  No sipon on the blanket?  Indeed I am proud.  “You didVery good!”  At that point, Jamie finishes her feed so I plop her nice and content in her bouncy chair and get up to rinse the dirty washcloth.

I head straight to the bed but I don’t see the pamunas.  Instead I only find her toys.  The floor and the blankets are clean as well.  “Sam where‘s your pamunasI thought you put it back?

My Mommyology Sam's big smile

With a smile like that, how can one do any wrong? 🙂

“Yes!  Here!”  she exclaims proudly runs up to the drawers which hold her clean towels and washcloths and points inside.  I tentatively open it with a looming sense of doom, and lo and behold, staring back at me is the used, snot-filled pamunas, nestled in quite comfortably infecting all the other clean items.  There was no way to remove it without somehow dirtying parts of the other pieces as well.

I wince and turn to look at Sam and she is looking back at me with smiling eyes and a huge grin plastered from ear to ear, waiting for me to say something.  “I’m so proud of you mom!”  She hints.

The Moral of the Story:  Mental note:  Buy more detergent.

July 4, 2011
by mymommyology
6 Comments

Men in Labor? REALLY.

Okay — I apologize for the sarcasm in the title, but it is meant to be funny.

As we all know there is the perennial (perpetual?) debate about which gender is the stronger sex.  In all fairness to my husband though, after watching me deliver both his children we haven’t really had much discussion on the topic.

In any case, I saw this article on Babble.com and it brought back memories of my husband’s initial skepticism about my pain threshold when I first went into labor.  I just had to  re-post this! 🙂

Even if it is simulated and missing a lot of elements such as emotion, actual prolonged labor and the actual delivery of a baby, kudos to Dr. Rochford for attempting to empathize!

July 2, 2011
by mymommyology
8 Comments

My Mommyology Recommends: Before Ever After (The Book Trailer)

I happily and excitedly share this news for several reasons:

  • The author of the book, Samantha Sotto, also author of the blog The Slight Detour is Filipina, and someone I actually know!  (How cool is that, knowing a soon-to-be famous best selling author! 🙂  I also do like her name. 😉  heehee!)
  • The excerpts that I’ve read of the book (from her blog) are very interesting and I genuinely am curious about the plot.  See the praise for Before Ever After has received by Best Selling Authors.
  • The producer of the book’s trailer is also a very dear friend, who happens to be our favorite video producer at my company, your Brand Story.
  • The idea of a book trailer:  to be honest, I had never encountered that until now (although looking through You Tube, it appears that lots of books have done it, I’ve just never seen it before).  I think it’s a wonderful idea, taking a static medium and promoting it so dynamically, using  popular social networks.  It also literally, brings the story to life.  In a way you can imagine what the movie would look like!

The book will be released by August 2, but you can already pre-order your copy online.  I already did!

Congratulations again to Sam!  We’re so excited for you! 🙂

June 29, 2011
by mymommyology
7 Comments

Kumon and My Two Daughters

My Mommyology Kumon

As my husband likes to say, "Oh C'mon!" (pronounced Kooh-mohn)

Both my daughters are known at the Kumon center here in Chapel Hill, but for varying reasons.

Yes, Sam does Kumon, at 2.5 years of age.

A few months ago, the Tiger Mother in my husband (yes, you read correctly) told me to find a way to get Sam interested in math.  Since there isn’t an existing DVD of Your Child Can Add as we like to joke, we looked for a Kumon Center near us and checked to see if she could be enrolled in it.

Jimmy, the owner, did an initial evaluation of Sam one afternoon and said that at first she seemed shy and unresponsive, but when she finally warmed up to him, he could see that she was a very intelligent little girl, and she knew a lot for her age (I think my smile went from one end of the room to the other when I heard that!).  In any case, he wanted us to take it slow with her because she was (is!) still very young, but he’d be happy to have her as his youngest student.

We stay for 30 minutes every Tuesday and Friday afternoon as Sam does her drills, and never fails to impress him and the other moms in the waiting room.  Jimmy said to time her when we do the exercises at home, and when I show him how we do, he is surprised at how fast she goes.  That and, he’s amazed that she will sit through the entire session and do the exercises, only getting up when she is done.  Other children her age he says, spend part of their time running around and are easily distracted.  Of course, this is where the Tiger Mother in me comes to play, because when we do the drills at home, I also make sure that she sits through it and doesn’t do anything else until it is done, and done properly.  I don’t pressure her on time but I am strict about the quality of her work.

Sometimes it is difficult to keep her interested especially when she feels it’s too repetitive for her taste, but that is the nature of Kumon I think, so we pummel through.  I am full of praise when she does a good job, but I also sometimes have to be creative and negotiate. To Sam’s credit, after settling on a suitable compromise (ie “We can watch Sound of Music after Kumon Mom.”), she will go through the rest of the drills without a hitch.

I do worry a lot that she may be too young for it (and I am ready to pull her out and stop at any time I feel that it is stressing her out more than she is learning), but she genuinely likes it.  Surprisingly she’ll tell me everyday that she wants to do her Kumon, and after each session she says that she had fun.  I guess it also helps that when she’s at the center, the assistants play with her as well when they attend to her and turn her exercises into a game.  They too are amazed at her tenacity as well as her skill.

Now as for Jamie…

Naturally Jamie tags along in her carseat when we go.  More often than not she is awake, and so I bring a set of the Your Baby Can Read  cards and we read the words there.  It helps keep her quiet and distracted, without me having to look like a loon dancing all around.  Also for me, it’s making idle time more productive.  So the moms have stared at us as well,  half amused and the other half probably think I am crazy to be teaching my 3-month old daughter to read.

But that’s not all.

You see, when we’re at the center – Jamie chooses that moment to poop.  EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.  And it’s not the dainty feminine kind, but rather the explosive one that causes heads to turn.  Of course I’m quick to point out that it is her (lest they think it was ME who made the loud farting sound!), and I make an obvious motion of picking up her bag and going into a corner to change her.  That’s the other thing, there is no changing table at the center (why would they put one after all) and so I’ve to do it on the floor of the waiting room.  Thankfully she is cute and innocent and of course she smiles after she has done her business, so no one shows that they “mind” when I toss a plastic bag with poop into the trash.  I silently pray that it will not stink up the place (at least while we’re still in it).  I am also quite sure that since I’m the only parent who brings an infant into the center, when they clean out the trash, they pretty much know who left the little souvenir.

So that is our weekly Kumon experience.  Or should I say ritual?

Each time we go I always enter with a lot of pride, a little embarrassment, and at least one plastic bag.

June 27, 2011
by mymommyology
8 Comments

The Sugar High

Lately Sam has been more vocal about her wants for sweets and junk food.  The junk food I will blame on her father (and one of her godfathers who stayed with us for 7 weeks) who has a regular stash of Pringles that Sam is now tall enough to reach for and open, in spite of my protests.  The sweets….well, okay.  It’s both our faults since we both have a sweet tooth (Of course Mom isn’t solely to blame! ;))

I’ve been trying to control Sam’s intake of sweets since she learned about them.  She’s still not allowed to eat candies or chocolates.  Occasionally she can have a sliver of some cake or bites of a cupcake, maybe a cookie or two depending on the kind (and how much sugar is on it), or a few spoonfuls of ice cream (with sprinkles).  Mostly I worry about two things:  that she develop cavities early on, and that she acquire diabetes (since it runs in the family).  Thankfully that little bit of strictness has paid off and she doesn’t really crave for sweets a lot.

A third reason would be that her sugar highs hit almost instantaneously; and when they do the poor thing doesn’t know what to do with herself!

My Mommyology Blondie Bar

Extremely yummy, if I do say so myself.

Take yesterday, for instance.  We had our usual after-nap family Sunday outing at BuyBuyBaby and Barnes & Noble; the latter stop at Sam’s request.  Naturally the hungry cow that I am went straight for the cafe and ordered a sandwich and a blondie bar with some M&Ms (aka Blondie Blast).  I said that I’d share a little of it with Sam since she’d been extra obedient this past weekend, and because I know she likes eating anything colorful (read: anything with M&Ms or sprinkles on themShe says it’s like eating a rainbow).  Of course the deal we made was that she had to share my sandwich  and then she’d get her “sur-prize” dessert after.  Now with me, she knows that a deal is a deal, and so she agreed.

In the middle of our meal, Jamie decides to do her business, and so I leave Sam and the food in Dad’s care.  I debriefed him on our deal and left.

Seven minutes later I’m back at the table and the Blondie Blast is out and practically gone.  One look at Sam’s smeared face, stuffed mouth and even more colorful smile (“Look Mom!  M&M cake!”), it was obvious as to where it went.

“Did you let her eat that all?!”  I asked horrified.

Daddy the enabler nodded eagerly and amused.  “She really likes it!  It’s good!”  was his reply.  (Thought bubble:  Of COURSE it’s good — it’s a blondie bar with m&m’s!!!) He said that the minute she saw it she dropped her pesto with chicken and bread and opted to eat that instead. (Exasperated thought bubble: Now WHO in their right mind wouldn’t do that?!)

Here’s the thing:  When Sam likes what she’s eating, there’s no stopping her.  She will use both hands and stuff large chunks of food in her mouth and is admittedly, quite a delight to watch.  It is a sight Daddy loves to see, which only meant:  the deal with mom went out the window and got run over by the cars on the street.

Oh dear Lord.  That was at least 250 calories!!!  Toddlers their age I’m told should only have 800-1000 calories a day, so an entire Blondie Blast would have covered 30% of what she’d need.

And then it hit.  The sugar high.

Sam’s voice went up 3 decibels, and she went on and on and on, speaking gibberish, singing nonsense and squealing at anything that moved.  She was also extra hard to catch, as I saw Dad struggling with Jamie in one arm and dragging Sam with the other, looking for me (I had gone book-shopping, heehee).  She wanted to go everywhere and nowhere at once, and was whinier than ever when it was time to leave.  Sugar highs make it harder for kids to listen to their parents — as if it’s not hard enough on a regular basis!

Thankfully with a lot of water and some milk and a banana in her, the sugar high dropped and exhaustion hit.  There were no arguments about going straight into our bedtime routine, and there were no tantrums either.  I didn’t offer her any more dinner either.  And in retrospect, I didn’t get ANY of the dessert that we were supposed to “share”!  Hmph.

The Moral of the Story:  Dads can’t be trusted with blondies. 😉

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